So, recently I embarked on a journey. I read a blog, I started thinking about the challenge it suggested, and I participated. It was about praying for your future life mate, praying that they may learn how to be strong in their faith, praying that they might learn to trust God, praying for their decision making skills, and so on and so on. I thought it seemed like a great challenge to try for two weeks, and if I liked it, I’d continue.
Today, as I finished my last day of this 2 week challenge, God opened my eyes to something. I was doing it wrong. I was doing it all backwards. I wasn’t stepping out in faith and thanking him for something that he hasn’t yet given me ( as the post suggested), I was once again, telling him what I think I he should send me.
Wrong, wrong, wrong! Stop it Holly Lynn! Seriously, have you learned nothing?
So now, I’ve been reflecting. It wasn’t really “wrong”, just not something I needed to do. If I trust God indefinitely, doesn’t that mean that I should trust him enough to just KNOW that if and when he sends me the right person, he will be exactly who God had in mind for me? Yes! Should I not be praying for God to make ME acceptable to HIM and not some human man who will NEVER EVER come close to showing me the love that God does? Again, Yes! Should I not be striving and seeking God before anything else? Should I not first seek the Kingdom of heaven like Matthew 6:33 tells me? YES YES YES!!!
God revealed to me that I was not being obedient, I was praying for a man who might not ever come, and honestly, if he doesn’t, I’ll be ok.
I am already in love. I love God. I’m reading daily, praying constantly, and trying to be obedient to God, and that’s all the “relationship” I have time for right now. I want to grow that relationship, I want to fall head over heels in love with God and his word and his works. I want to praise him through every storm, I want to listen when he tells me to be quiet, I want to have a closeness that I can not get if I am distracted. I don’t have time for distractions. I don’t have time for another man. I don’t have the time to worry about another man, I’m too busy falling in love with the only one who will ever truly be able to complete me.
When God is done with me, he might think that I’m ready for someone else to come in and help me through my earthly life, but if he doesn’t, I have to be okay with that. But for now, God is still molding me, he is still trying to teach me to be the woman that I desperately want to be. I’m not saying that praying for your future is a bad thing, but I trust God too much to try to tell him how to do his job…
Peace and Love and Lesson, God Bless,